It's 1.36am. I'm supposed to be asleep now, preparing for a supposedly happy day tomorrow. But now, I'm here again. Millions and millions of thoughts in my mind, so much so that if I'm not here, I would be somewhere else, still thinking of all these bullshit. Is it my oversensitiveness acting up again, or is it that guys don't know how fragile a girl's heart can be. How some hurtful things can hurt them. Probably because we are best friends and couples, we love each other, play together and fight with one another, call each other names. But sometimes, some words really do hurt. One word in particular, whatever. I'm not kicking up a big fuss just because of this word. Out of the 9 deadly words that girls said. Whatever means "Fuck you" and when they say that, they mean it. When someone says that to me, in a not-joking-manner. I really take the meaning as fuck you, and I find it really offensive. Especially with that fucked up tone. I really hate it. It shows me how much you don't give a fuck about how I feel. As time goes by, yeah, the flaws slowly show itself up. Why. Because we are comfortable, we need not put up any pretence. Thats when thats our most true self. As time goes by, we become intolerant of each other, we stopped trying like the first time. We just stopped. Why is this so hurting. Am I too weak, do I have too many tears, time, brain cells to fret over all these? No, we're girls, women. We're sensitive, emotional, that's us. People take things for granted, no matter how much they say they won't. I think I'm too expressive sometimes, it's better for me to bottle things up. I don't know. I feel insecure. One moment I feel like I'm the happiest girl alive, the next moment I could feel like the saddest girl alive. Sometimes i feel like making a swear, that i'll never cry again. But, i didnt make that swear cos my heart is fragile. Can I have a shoulder please, can I have a tissue please, can I have someone who will love me and never give up on me for the rest of their lives please.
